NaturalChildbirth.org

[Kandyk]

Wow, I'm so thankful i found this site and have really enjoyed reading about others experiences. I'm at 33 weeks now and have decided in the past week to scrap the hospital birth idea and go natural with a midwife at home.
Its crazy the amount of negative response i've had, people think I'm insane and putting my child at risk by avoiding the typical hospital route, To be honest, hospitals scare me half to death and the idea of going through this amazing life changing experience in an unfamiliar place with a bunch of strangers makes no sense to me.

I've done my research, and was really inspired and shocked after watching 'The business of being born', Right away i watched it again with my husband and he agreed home birth seemed the right option for us. Which was quite a shock as he was very pro hospital and i thought i'd have quite the fight on my hands!
So far i've been with an OB/GYN and had a pretty vile experience. I'm from England and although I'm married, I'm still not a citizen as the process takes Time and money, so insurance hasn't been an option to us. As a self paying mother to be i have hit so many brick walls, the receptionists have been so rude to me at the clinic i've run out in tears and feared going back. My doctor is a little strange and seems very good at avoiding answers to my questions or somehow answering them without giving me any information at all!
When i discussed wanting a water birth that was automatically written off as Arizona hospitals don't allow it?!? And after discussing wanting to go natural, i was told i would have to have an IV as soon as i got to the birthing room as its hospital policy, to me, this just sounds like its gonna be so easy for them to administer drugs i will have to put up quite the fight to get what i want, which isn't the situation i want to be in when in labour! He also explained to me he supported natural birth but thinks epidurals work very well and I will probably want one?!
This comes from the same man that scared us half to death telling me i had Venus Lakes and that these could cause my baby to not grow and we would have to do an emergency ultrasound which would cost close to $1000, after a regular ultrasound the nurse told me these lakes were very common in pregnancy and rarely caused a problem, she didn't usually even report them as they're that normal! Thankfully the scan proved they were not causing any problems at all and our baby is right on track.

I met with a lovely Midwife yesterday and I'm really thinking going with her for the rest of my pregnancy is a good idea, I'm low risk, this is my first baby, I'm 25 and i trust in the female body to just do what it needs too when the time comes. I'm trying to be prepared for a hospital birth if an emergency comes up, But fingers crossed that won't happen.

I was really worried about changing plans so late in to the pregnancy but having read some of the stories on here it gives me confidence that no matter how late into it, I'm making the right decision for my baby.

I would love a water birth but we're still deciding on that, sadly money plays a big factor

Wasn't sure wether to post this in the new member forum or here but i thought as its mostly about my labor choice, here would be a good spot!

Thanks for reading and please carry on with the inspiring stories, it really helps first timers like me

Kandy
xox

[Alison]

I'm a licensed midwife in Arizona, and I know there are a couple of CNMs who are trying to get waterbirth to be allowed in a couple of the hospitals, but so far the hospital administration is absolutely not allowing it.

I'm so glad you've found the path that will work best for you!

Money doesn't have to be a factor in a home waterbirth. While I've had some clients rent to really big, nice tubs, most end up going with an inflatable kiddy pool that is at least 21 inches deep and no more than 60 inches across. They are fairly widely available. I know that most spring/summers I can find them at Fry's, Walmart, Target, and assorted toy stores. In the summer, they are usually under $20. Additionally, you'd need a plastic tarp to put under the tub, an unused garden or drinking water hose, and an adapter for the hose to fit on a faucet. That's pretty much all that's required.
_________________
"The truth shall set you free, but first it will make you mad."

"And the time came when the risk to remain tight in a bud was more painful than the risk it took to blossom"

[Kandyk]

Your in Arizona too?
I had my consultation with Shell Walker, do you know of her? We haven't decided for sure yet as she doesn't accept our ACCHS insurance so we need to some how come up with her fee which we're gonna try and get loaned from some family members this weekend.
I would just hate to not get the birth experience thats right because of money, I'll find a way round it!

pools,
Yeah the rental ones are pretty pricey, I've seen them for around $250, the only thing that worries me about buying a kiddy pool is keeping the temperature right as i know most labor's are pretty long, do you have any advice for that? If we can buy a cheap pool that would be great, water births look so amazing!

Thanks so much for the advice!!
xox

[Psalm127]

[Kandyk]

Totally!

Well it sounds like fate that you got a much better birth experience then was previously mapped out for you.
I'm hoping we can work everything out with the midwife, i know when i put my mind to things i usually get what i want and this isn't the kind of thing to back down on.

Its just so scary when its your first time, I'm kinda going in to this blind even though i've done a ton of research. Its just funny how people put the fear in to you, like things are obviously gonna go wrong because I'm not doing the typical hospital birth.

Thanks for your encouraging words
xox

[Psalm127]

[CFLhomeschooler]

I was 25 when I had my first, and it was my easiest of all the births. Well after 4 births, 2 at the hospital and 2 at a birthing center, let me tell you- it is very difficult to fight while you are in labor. Labor is not an intellectual experience - it draws you into more of an instinctual state, making decision making difficult. If I where in your shoes I would absolutely go with the midwife. The hospitals are so wrapped up in their policies. At my first and second births hospital staffers out right lied to us to get us to follow policy and make their job easier at our expense and our baby's expense! They are there to clock in and clock out. Even if you did have a doctor who supports natural birth, most of your labor is handled by nurses you've never met. With a midwife you know that she will be there and she will (most likely) be supporting your birth plan. I say most likely because every once in a while there is a midwife that pulls out interventions at the last minute, but that is the exception.
_________________
Child of God my king, wife of a wonderful husband, and mother of 4!

Marital conflict is not husband vs. wife, but husband and wife vs. our common enemy.

[Kandyk]

This is my thoughts too, I'm not gonna be in any state to fight when I'm going through labor!
Its good to hear you did well at 25, i feel as prepared as you can be and now i know i won't be in a hospital, i feel far more relaxed about the whole thing, i think my mind set will be better and i'll just be able to concentrate on me and the baby rather then everything thats going on around me.
I've even started dreaming about it!

The midwife I've met with seems very loving and understanding, i think after a few more visits i'll feel far more comfortable with her.
My family have surprised me and been very supportive, which helps a lot, i know its my choice, but having them understand my reasons makes me feel more confident in my decision.

I'm just concerned now about the water birth, if i do get my own birthing tub, how will i keep the water at a good temperature?
I could use the bath but our bathroom is really tiny and would be too uncomfortable for 3 of us to be in there and i don't want my husband to have to wait outside, i want him right by my side.
Any advice?

Thanks for all the responses so far ladies

[Alison]

Yes, I am seeing clients in Gilbert. I'm in the East Valley, though I apprenticed with Pam Qualls in Glendale. Talk about a long commute!

My party to celebrate getting my license was at Shell's office. She's a sweet heart. In two weeks, I'm teaching a doula training at the Babymoon Inn. (Shell's new place) You'll find that the midwifery community in Phoenix is a very small world. lol Everybody knows everybody else.

Re: ACCCHS:
ACCCHS doesn't accept licensed midwives as providers. It involves more red tape than a normal person would think is possible to fix that problem!

Re: pools:
During labor, when the water cools done, I and my assistant will bail out a couple of pots full of water, boil them on the stove, and then put the hot water back in the tub. The midwife and/or assistant does all the work to keep the water warm. Also, I saw a client one time put a foam mat down on the floor, place a waterbed heater on top of that, and then placed to pool over the heater to keep the water warm. It worked very nicely.

Best wishes to you in making these important decisions!

[Kandyk]

Thanks for the advice Alison!
Makes the whole thing with insurance a little clearer, and to be honest, although we're very tight on cash it feels good to know the money will go towards keeping the midwifery community alive! I whole heartedly support everything you amazing ladies do!

Thanks for the advice on the pool, i've been researching all afternoon/evening and see there's quite a few possibilities out there, i think i'll speak with Shell before i make a decision on which one.

And how amazing is Shell's office? My hubby and i thought we were at the wrong place when we arrived!haha
It was so nice to meet her and she had a lady there with a 2 week old newborn and she looked so happy! Really gave me confidence that this is the best choice!

Thanks for all the advice so far ladies! It really helps! I can't wait to be able to post my birth story on here next month!!
xox

[CFLhomeschooler]

I'm so glad that you are feeling good about everything. Birth is so psychological. It really helps to go into it in a good frame of mind. Oh 25 is so young!!!! I was 32 when I had #4 and I'm starting to feel it. I know women who've had babies in their 40's!!!! But this last one, pregnancy and all was noticably tougher. You're still young!
_________________
Child of God my king, wife of a wonderful husband, and mother of 4!

Marital conflict is not husband vs. wife, but husband and wife vs. our common enemy.

[Julie]

[Alison]

I was 21 with the first, 24 with the second, 27 with the third, 29 with the fourth, 31 with the fifth, and 34 with the sixth. I'm here to say that pregnancy was far easier physically when I was 21. However, knowing my own mind and standing up for myself is easier now that I'm older. I had aches and pains with the sixth baby that I never had with the first few, but I was in a much better place with that birth than probably any of the others.
_________________
"The truth shall set you free, but first it will make you mad."

"And the time came when the risk to remain tight in a bud was more painful than the risk it took to blossom"

[CFLhomeschooler]

I have to agree that I have grown more confident in speaking up for myself as well. More confident as a mother too.
_________________
Child of God my king, wife of a wonderful husband, and mother of 4!

Marital conflict is not husband vs. wife, but husband and wife vs. our common enemy.

[Kandyk]

I feel happy to be going through this at 25, i certainly wasn't responsible enough at 21, far too wild for my own good. And i think I'm far better at standing up for myself now too.

But my husband is 21 so he makes me feel like a 21yr old a lot of the time!

[mamaora]

It was almost 9 years ago but I also had similar decision change at 34 weeks. Everyone just HAD to tell me the horror stories but I don't regret ANYTHING. We have been blessed with 4 homebirths and can't imagine anything else. Follow your gut and your heart and trust your body and your midwife...